David Dickinson appeared on 'Ruby', BBC 1, 10.00 am Monday 14 January 2002

'The|Official David Dickinson Website' offered visitors a chance to go along to the recording. Regular visitor Darren Stokes took up the invitation and this is his eye witness report complete with an exclusive photo of David from the set which Darren took himself.

I got a mail. from Fiona to say that DD was gonna be on Ruby and it was being recorded at the MTV studios in Camden Town . I phoned on the morning to ask if I could come. The lady asked how old I was and if I had anything that DD could value. I basically had nothing that I would call an antique so I ended taking an old ceramic 1911 bottle that my brother dug up when he was a kid .
I knew it wasn't gonna be worth much but thought I'd get a better chance of meeting DD if I had an object
Got to the studio and joined the back of the line of people. A rather gorgeous woman from the production office smiled and said I'm sorry lads but we've over booked and there isn't enough seating for you both.

I thought to myself 'NO WAY how often is DD ever in London ?' So I argued and said your staff said we were on the guest list. I followed that up with Do you know how far we've come ? We wanna meet Dave Dickinson !!!!
I've got something for him to value as well. She said Ok hang on and went inside.Two minutes later we were in and wearing passes. Once inside we saw there were some rather strange looking audience attendees . There were heavily tattoed woman ,some Drag Queens and a coach party of O.A.P.s !
My brother said what 'kind of show is this?' , I laughed .

Eventually we went in and me and my brother were split up with him going to the back , I was left standing ( The only one ! ) as there was one seat short which the audience thought was pretty funny. I was seated after 5 minutes in the front row , also I was moved up and down the row another 3 times , this also got a few laughs form the others who were seated !!!!! I saw the funny side and knew I was gonna have a laugh!.

Then came a comedian-Warrm up man ( Not very Funny ! )
Then on came Ruby with a script and sat on the sofa .
I won't bore you with the guests so they were .......
Glennis Kinnock ( Neil's wife )
A Buddhist Yogi
A cosmetic surgeon
They show was about " Vanity " Was this a dig at DD ????????

After about 2 hours she introduced a Bargain Hunt clip of DD at work , then said 'Ladies and gentleman Daaavid Dickinson !'

On he came wearing a trademark cream suit with flamboyant lapels and all the classic jewelry that we have come to expect .

DD opened up by saying that he admired Neil Kinnock and thought he was one of the only honest politicians around to Glennis's delight ! ( what a charmer ! ) Dave also said that some of his best clients were Members of
Parliament !!!!! Ruby talked to the guests about cosmetic surgery. DD said that he wouldn't rule out surgery as he is on television. Ruby started on DD clothes and asked him how much is watch cost (trying to embarrass him ! )
It didn't work DD replied 'If you wanna know I'll tell you 15 thousand pounds !' The audience gasped .
She poked fun at his cufflinks and then the hair got attacked . DD took it all in good spirits remarking he has had the same hair since the sixties !! Ruby showed the camera a photo of a young 60s DD and the crowd laughed .
THE HAIR WAS THE SAME !!!!!!!!!!!!.
DD said as a kid he had big ears and that his Grandmother used to tell him to stick his ears back with chewing gum , but he grew hair over them and still does !
Ruby said 'You're a very spivvy person' to which Dave replied " Hardly I live in a Barn !!!! "
DD was on top form and wasn't gonna be shown up .
DD explained about his gold ring and said it was the only bit of antique gold that he was wearing he said it was once a seal in olden times . Ruby said I read that you're a cult figure now on BBC Why ?
DD said It's true I get around 2.1 million people tuning in and also managed to drop in " Cracking " for the fans .

Ruby said 'Has anyone got anything that Dave could value ?' I put up my hand , but she went to the back .
DD valued a Pendant chain , another Chain and also valued an old lady with his arm around her saying that she was in good condition and probably around fifty years old ! I think it made her day !
DD was whisked by Ruby back on the set and I thought TOO LATE .Ruby said 'Is that It?' and I shouted out 'NNNNnoooooooooo ! '
So I took it upon myself to take the bottle up to the sofa and present it to Dave . I handed it to him and dropped the line " What can you tell me about this ? " He realised then I was a fan !!!!!!!
He basically gave the history of this old bottle and tried to be polite and after 2 minutes handed it to Ruby
I shouted ( seated by now ) 'How much is it worth?' to which Dave said 'About 5 pounds' !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The audience laughed loudly at this and Ruby cracked up . I said to the camera 'Well that's better than nothing !' Dave was grinning . Ruby gestured she was gonna throw it back ! NO I THOUGHT she wouldn't........
She threw it alright and it's a very heavy bottle I caught it square in the lap and again the crowd cracked up !!!
Well I thought ,at least I might get on now !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dave mentioned that he was really an expert on furniture and told the crowd ......'I haaaate POTS !!!' ( Classic ! )Dave then stayed on set for a face pack segment and laid back on a seat ( He was game I tell you )
A Swedish guy came on who was Swedish and sounded just like the chef from the Muppet show !!!!!!!!!!!
He and Ruby made an organic face pack . Ruby really slapped this stuff on DD's face at one point stuffing it up his nose ! All the time she was messing up the hair and making a mess .The Swede did a nice neat job,

RUBY DIDN'T ! She smeared it all over 'Poor Dave 'who sat there taking it in good spirits !
At one point he lifted his head and Ruby slammed it down with a handful of gunk ! The crowd roared again !
Dave had really saved this programme ! Which until his entrance was just DULL !!!!!!!
Dave asked the Swede what's that your adding? The Swede said " Clay "
Dave replied" I told you I hate pots !!!!! " Hooray I shouted !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then the Swede that's it ! to David's relief who was covered in green gunk ! He said in broken English" Noooow wait 20 minutes "
The crowd roared !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ruby attacked Glennis Kinnock with the gunk and they had a gunk slinging match, Dave staying out of it ( He was already covered ).

Ruby said " That's it guys thanks for comin !!!!! " Although Strictly Forbidden I got a photo of DD covered in gunk still seated ! I hope to share it soon as it gets developed !

Some BH fans approached Dave and chatted about the show ! I got the feeling Dave wanted to wash his face and JUST GO ! I was gonna go over to him but had to fill out consent forms in case I get in the show ! And by the time I had done all this DD was gone !

All in all a 'cracking' day out ! Thanks again to Fiona for the tip off about the show !

Darren Stokes